Tony.Lisa.Kai.Luca.Mia

One Year Later...

2009-07-10T12:23:00.000-07:00

Kai celebrating his kindergarten graduation at McDs.

The all important towel shot - Mia is 8 weeks on the nose.

8 weeks and sporting another new outfit. That girl has more clothes than me!

Mommy, Kai and Mia on Father's Day.
Luca in his aviator shades, striking a pose!

This past week was fairly significant for us in several ways. We celebrated our 8 year wedding anniversary, Mia turned 2 months (its flown) and probably foremost on my mind was the anniversary of losing the baby last summer. It was amazing how much we grieved that, and yet here we are (never forgetting) but so thankful for all that God has done in the past year. Not only did he bless us with another baby, but sustained us through a high risk pregnancy, and brought us exactly what he knew we needed - Mia. She is just our little sunshine and I am constantly amazed at the way she has turned our home upside down and filled it with even more joy.

Kai also graduated kindergarten at the end of June, which was exciting and yet filled me with apprehension - in two months he will leave my home AAALLLL day long, and will be subject to many more ideals, personalities and temperments for more hours each day than I will spend with him. Scary!

Luca is still my little man. He is turning into more and more of a ham each day. Doing silly little dances in the Superstore aisles and making eyes at me to get a laugh.

How thankful and blessed we are. We had Mia dedicated in church a few weeks back and we made an interesting observation. The first Sunday we returned after the miscarriage, Tony was leading and felt to play "Blessed Be Your Name" The lyric in the song is: "You give and take away. You give and take away. My heart will chose to say; Lord, blessed be Your Name" He cried while trying to choke out that line that Sunday morning. Fast forward over a year later, and we were up dedicating our new daughter. After a full year of not playing that song, the song leader led us in those same lines: "You give and take away" Truly it was not a coincidence. God is faithful and good and can be trusted, even we we are reeling in uncertainty - He Gives!

Funny Things

2009-06-15T08:53:00.000-07:00

2 Funny things my boys said:

Kai: "Mommy - when you leave the baby alone, I'm like a VULTURE! I just swoop right in"

Luca: While examining his nipple: "Mommy, dis my nipplepotamus"

4 Weeks Later...

2009-06-08T09:41:00.000-07:00

So Mia is 4 weeks today! The first week of her wee life, I couldn't have imagined we would settle into a routine with 3 kids in the Clark family, but slowly and ever so unnoticiably we have. Mia is sleeping longer stretches at night, with fewer and fewer bad nights interspersed. How blessed we are to have our family complete and healthy. Attached is Mia 4 weeks to the day!

Malachi is now finishing up kindergarten. I can hardly believe it. He's been bringing home is work from school, and is adding and subtracting already. Really? In kindergarten? They also sent home his Grade 1 school supplies list. I can't believe I am old enough to have a kid that is old enough to get school supply lists. Don't you remember that excitement as a kid? Brings back all those memories of perfectly labeled and organized supplies. What do you want to bet he takes those supplies in and out his bag a million times before September comes?? :)

Luca is a little ball of fire these days. He reached the 'terrible 2s' when he turned 3. He is still so engaging and charming and funny, but has added a whole new set of traits to the list. Demanding, stubborn, feisty and disobedient. We love him the same but man, how do you parent it when you have a newborn in your lap all day?

I am cherishing (or trying to) each moment of the crazy daily grind of being a mom to young kids!

Dear Daddy...

2009-05-27T10:21:00.000-07:00

Thank you for taking such good care of me when I'm squirmy and fussy in the night.

She's Already GROWING!!

2009-05-22T16:30:00.001-07:00

I cannot accept the fact that she has ALREADY GROWN! She is 11 days today, and I put on a pre-washed sleeper that she wore last week. Last week I rolled the sleeves and the legs were much too long. This week the arms are almost short if she stretches, and the legs are a snug fit. ACCKK. I need to breathe it in every moment, because she is changing before my very eyes. Her knees are a little less 'baggy' and her skin is a little less buttery. What a miracle these first few days are. She has 100% stolen my heart, her big brothers' hearts, and of course her daddy's heart. God grant me the clarity of mind amid exhaustion not to wish even a moment away. To treasure those middle of the night feedings and relish the fact that simply the sound of my voice brings her comfort. *sigh* young love....

Little Miss Mia!!

2009-05-17T11:03:00.000-07:00

We are beyond thrilled to announce the birth of our new baby girl - Mia Soleil ! ! ! She was born Monday night, May 11th at 7:45. It was a wicked labour, but she was worth every stitch of it. She weighed just barely 8 lbs and was 20" long. She is a picture of perfect health and has already brought us much joy! Tony is totally wrapped around her wee finger. Mia Soleil = My Sunshine!!

We continue to try to figure out my blood clot and DVT issues. I was put back on my needles and was also put on a drug called comoudin. It is a rat poison (literally) that they say is okay while breastfeeding as only trace amounts can be found in the breastmilk - please pray for this. I go to the hospital daily to give blood and try to monitor my blood levels. Hopefully soon this will all be a distant memory (2 more months?).

All in all we are completely blessed and trying to get into the swing of things. It feels like we are a BIG family now. Amazing how one extra child bumps up the workload 10 fold!

Attached are a few pictures of our sunshine!

Okay Okay Already

2009-04-23T22:15:00.000-07:00

I know you all deserve to read cute anecdotes about my little boys, and see pictures of their wee cute cute faces, but I'm just too darn tired. All my remaining creative energy is being poured into finishing work up (less than a week to go!) and all the other energy I possess is being poured into nesting and getting this house ready for a baby again. So... Here is the countdown

Needles: 11 to go!! (From 257 [i think])
Baby: 13 days (or sooner should the good Lord step in [yes please])

booyah!

Spring Break Busyness

2009-04-07T15:00:00.000-07:00

Spring Break was full of all sorts of tasks. We painted the nursery, installed wainscotting. Emptied out our basement and hauled away tons of clutter, painted all the basement floors to cut down on the dust in the house and in between all that, tried to have some family time. Behold: Our trip to the Manitoba Museum. There happened to be a dinosaur exhibit, which was great fun for the family. (I must admit - 1/2 way through 4 hours of walking, I caved and let Tony push me around in a wheelchair! haha) It was possibly the last big day out before baby's arrival. Enjoy!

ahhhhh...light.

2009-03-23T19:10:00.000-07:00

So nothing much new to say except that...wait for it.... I only have 41 more needles to go!! That is such great news. Induction date is set for May 6 or 7 and I CANNOT WAIT to meet my tiny little sweet pea. The anticipation is nearly killing me. I find each pregnancy I get more excited to meet the addition to our family. It is insane busy here with work, but I am okay with plugging away and then enjoying a full 4 months sans paint swatches and blueprints!

My New Room!

2009-03-18T14:27:00.000-07:00

I am so incredibly blessed! I love love love to be creative in my home, and make beautiful spaces, but it can get very expensive. I am fortunate to have a husband who understands this incredible itch I have. Designing other peoples' spaces is great, but there is nothing like the excitement and pleasure of creating a space you get to enjoy everyday! So... after 8 years of marriage, and decorating every room in the house but ours, we were finally a priority. I was fortunate to receive tons of cash birthday gifts, bonus money like co-op gas cheques, and a fat tax return of which I used a portion of - and voila! We have a romantic, beautiful, functioning retreat. I just love to sit in my room now, read and have peace and quiet. I feel like I was magically plopped down into a gorgeous little New York hotel suite. Gotta also say that I love my new curtains - they are better quality than the old, and fully lined. They actually block out a lot of light, and allow me to nap during the day. (Just in time for baby's arrival!) A small thing, but yet a big thing. Here are probably a few too many photos of just one little room!

Birthday Pics!

2009-03-02T09:17:00.001-08:00

My Little Luca Turns 3!!

2009-03-02T08:21:00.000-08:00

Well I had to officially face the music this week - my wee Luca is not so 'wee' anymore. He isn't a toddler, but a little boy. A spiky haired, chicklet toothed, smoker voiced little drop of heaven in my home. He is starting to string together sentences (finally) and with each new word reminds me that he's no longer my baby.
I came home the other night with his 'Spiderman' birthday cake. (I'm not a fan of 'theme' parties and gimmicks, but when you end up with a child with an obsession, you inevitably cave to see the joy on their faces) When he saw that cake he hardly knew where to leave himself. He had to come back and look at it every few minutes and tell me all about it. That night at 10pm I crept into his room to take out his clothes for the next morning and he was WIDE awake. He gave me a big smile, so I crawled into bed next to him. He whispers in my ear: "I wuf my buwfday!" I couldn't contain my love for him and so ensued a kissing and cuddling session (of which Kai slept right through!) The next day was his party, and it nearly killed him to wait until 2am when friends were set to arrive. Of course, he was pure misery because he'd been up half the night, and fell asleep at 1:45 in my arms. (teehee - I was secretly overjoyed because babies fall asleep in your arms, not big boys!) We let him sleep for an hour or so, and the next 3 hours he spent in pure bliss with 30 family and friends, and lots of new cars and tractors, spiders, and spiderman toys. I will include just a few pictures from the big day.
Before I go there, I thought to make a list of all the things I love love love about my Luca.
1. I love your raspy little smoker's voice.
2. I love how you insist on being on my lap (like right now) although there is only about 2 inches between this big baby in my tummy and the table.
3. I love the way when I come into a room, your eyes LIGHT up and you have to sit with me. (exception: Papa is over to visit!)
4. I love the way you call yourself 'Coca' (although you will eventually have to figure it out)
5. I love the way you put your treasured possessions in your 'man room.' (A walk in closet full of his tools and remote control car and other random items.) "Don't touch ma stuff. Dis' all my stuff in my man woom."
6. I love the sound effects you make as you play quietly. (he's better than I am and he's 3!)
7. I love your obsession with gum. Always about the gum.
8. I love (and sometimes loathe) your sticky uppy crazy hair. It truly has it's own mind.
9. I love those big gorgeous blue eyes that have me caving when I shouldn't.
10. I love the way you walk on the balls of your feet and constantly beg to live only in your 'Cars' gitchies.
11. I love those 'ball' calves of yours. (and don't even get me started on those delicious noogies...)
12. I love the way you make me feel like the best mommy in the whole world, even when I know I might have failed big time.

Luca - you are the light of my life. I am totally amazed that God gave you to me, and so in awe of how you love me despite all my shortcomings.
Happy Birthday my wee man!

A Valentine's Day Tony Style

2009-02-17T08:42:00.000-08:00

So Tony is notorious for his either inability to remember special holidays, and then in his desperation to make up for things, will the next time a special season rolls around, pull out the red carpet and stress himself out to the max to make it extra special. This year was one of those 'make up' years.
At promptly 3:45 on Saturday afternoon, he told me he had lots to do and that I needed to await his phonecall and he would tell me where to go and what to do. I tried waiting (patiently) at my folks place for him to call. At shortly passed 6 the phone rang, and he told me he would be in the driveway in minutes, and to get my coat on.
Upon opening the car door, I was greeted with the smell of Niakwa Pizza - my favourite. It was clear now we weren't going out to eat. The questions was: where are we eating this pizza? He drove past our house and for the life of me, I couldn't figure him out. Low and behold he pulls up at our pastors house: how romantic right? Well, it turns out that Dave and Lynn were gone for the weekend. He led me down to their uber chic newly appointed basement, and there he had set up the romance. The lights were dimmed, the fireplace was crackling (err, okay, so it was gas, and didn't have a crackle, but is was ON!) Old skool Sting was on the sound system, the candles were quickly lit, and I was served sparkling wine (juice) from a nice glass bottle. He cracked open that pizza box, and my vegetarian pizza had a heart on it, made of olives. (They made him pay extra! - haha) The best part was that surrounding the table was one cinnamon heart (arranged in a pattern) for every day that we have been together. That is 11 years which is 4015 cinnamon hearts, all counted out by hand. (I am going to be eating from a garbage bag of cinnamon hearts for the next 5 years!) He had me pick one out at a time and then he shared a memory from our years together for that 'day'. After which we ate ice cream drumsticks for dessert, and watched a movie on the big flat screen TV in matching lazyboys.
He put a TON of effort into making this night special. I cannot even believe how we have grown up together. We sure have a lot more gray, and a few more wrinkles (ahem - smile lines. I'm not even going to go INTO the stretch mark talk) but a whole lot more love for each other. What a beautiful thing this business of love and marriage is!

A Day Out and Other Ramblings

2009-01-21T12:22:00.000-08:00

For those hoping for more news on the baby's progress, I have none for you, but I am finally sitting down to write a quick note. The boys and I have been trying to take the time to enjoy these few days of gorgeous weather God gave us all (to get us through the NEXT arctic blast) and the boys even persuaded me to get their bikes out of storage. Attempts to pedal through the snow were quite futile, but the boys were so thrilled to be out and on them, that they didn't complain.

I am beyond exhausted and trying to parent two boys who are hugging one minute, and hitting and screaming the next. How do you teach a 2 year old how to problem solve and talk about the heart issues when his brother takes a toy? It seems like I'm getting no where, but as with Malachi, I trust Luca will figure it out soon. I am ready to meet the baby, but am trying to slow down and enjoy these last months with the boys. I keep reminding myself I will never be in this place again, and most likely won't ever get to experience the joys (wee baby kicks) and frustrations (sore back, tummy pain, heartburn etc) of carrying a baby, and so trying to take it all in and be patient.

Enjoy the respite from the cold!

*SIGH **

2008-12-30T14:06:00.000-08:00

So I am in complete awe. I have new life inside of me. This baby has already stolen all our hearts, and I seriously CANNOT WAIT to meet him/her. Already like their sibling, they posed for the camera last week and gave us many beautiful shots. ENJOY!

Christmas is Here Again!

2008-12-18T18:33:00.000-08:00

I love love love Christmas! It really is the most wonderful time of the year. These are our 3 Christmas card choices - you should be receiving one in the mail soon!
Blessings
The Clark Family

Sweet Sweet Boys

2008-12-16T11:32:00.000-08:00

Kai striking a pose after a haircut.

Luca pretending to be a baby

Sweet Luca in the bath.

Enjoying the church Christmas program!

Kai at his first every school Christmas program pulling out the moves!

So I have officially lost the blogging mom challenge. Life is chaos (as is most peoples lives) I finished up a 6 week whirlwind renovation project for my mom - contracting these things out and all the design work is insane. (I will post pictures soon of the finished project) But, just these last few days have had time to sigh *sigh* (feels sooo good) and take some photos and enjoy my growing babes. It scares me to think that in a few short months what our family looks like will change, and the dynamics will never be the same! It will be good, I know that, but different and so I have to cherish these last moments for what they are. My tummy continues to grow and all appears well with babe. Very soon we'll know what the gender is, and we can start dreaming of names and pink or blue blankets. (You will all have to wait until May to find out though!)

Naming the Baby...

2008-12-03T11:09:00.000-08:00

"Hey Luca - is there a girl baby or a boy baby in my tummy?"
"A guwl baby."
"And what she we name the girl baby?"
"Carwash."

uhhhh yah, about that.....

Sorry

2008-11-17T08:12:00.001-08:00

So I know my blogging has been pathetic, but my life has been CHAOS. It's hard to get good pictures of your kids when you're on bedrest due to blood clots, and have a terrible sinus cold followed by a stomach flue ravaging the household! Yup, it's been that great! I will try to muster up the desire to get back in the game. And for those curious - the daily needles have become a daily annoyance, but not much more than that, and so I am thankful. Baby continues to thrive and has a steady little heartbeat of 160 bpm and that is also a blessing. Thanks all for the prayers!

Owwww!

2008-10-17T07:28:00.000-07:00

So this is not one of those fun posts with pictures of my boys. Its a health update and a call to pray!

Sunday night I tripped and fell at my sister's place in Carman. They have this great new hottub with these LED lights, but outside the tub is the 'black abyss'. I was bringing Luca to Tony in the hottub, and fell into a 1 foot gap. At that time I focused my attention on what I believed to be a broken toe. My foot immediately was swollen and bruised. The next day the pain was quite bad, and a trip to the ER confirmed a break clean through. I had started to notice increasing pain in my calf at this point, but thought it was just a light sprain from falling. I also had some cuts on the knee.

By Wednesday I realized that my toe was much better, but my calf was so bad I could hardly walk. I got in with my GP and he immediately ordered an ultrasound (as a precaution, so he said)

The next day at the ultrasound, the tech wouldn't even let me leave the hospital until he had paged my doctor. My ultrasound showed I had a blood clot! I thought obese people and very old people had blood clots. Turns out a severe trauma to the leg can result in a blood clot.

Right now the pain is the worst in the morning. I woke up and cried last night, because I got up to go to the bathroom and my leg cramped so badly. My mid day I can limp around, but I am in constant pain. I can compare it to those cramps you get in your calf in the middle of the night that just won't let go and leave your adrenaline pumping!

I am supposed to keep my leg up above my head for 20 hours per day and will be monitored by ultrasound. Should this clot not resolve within a week, I will have to receive blood thinners in hospital.

Please pray for my quick recovery. I am getting depressed sitting all day. My boys are fighting non-stop because they know I can't intervene. It's a zoo and I feel bad for lying in bed and screaming at them to stop!! ahhh!....

Boys Will Be Boys

2008-09-29T11:18:00.000-07:00

What is it about boys and things that are motorized? I was at S.A.R here in town to have our vehicle looked at, and it was a virtual boy paradise! I'm talking Harley's, Quads, Skidoos, and even mini four wheelers. Without any prompting from their mommy, these are the faces I saw... amazing!

Quad Gang...

Gotta love that Harley face...

Luca looks like he's giving some the ol' stink eye here....

Fall Family Time

2008-09-24T11:36:00.000-07:00

Ahhh, so typical Kai.

Coca my charmer pulls out the dimples.

Daddy and Malachi all scrubbed in and ready for the big game of 'Operation' Very serious business you see.

We hadn't heard a thing from Luca in a long time, and found him in his little 'gitchies' on my desk colouring. He was extremely focused - it was quite amazing!

Luca at Lilac Campground quite pumped about the pretzel snack.

Malachi rockin' his aviator shades.

So summer was once again too short. Tony went back to work, and left me alone with the boys. We did manage a few more days out end of August, and so here are some of those photos.

Kai in Kindergarten

2008-09-05T11:29:00.000-07:00

And so it is with all parents, I sent my first child into the world with mixed emotions. Excitement at all he is going to learn, all the people he'll meet, and all the fun he will have... BUT, on the other hand, he'll learn things I don't want him to know, he'll meet people who will hurt him, and some fun is just down right dangerous. How do you release this little tiny, impressionistic person who is been solely in your care into a big classroom, into a big school, and out into a big world?? I feel like my heart marched out the house today and entered kindergarten - it has indeed been a big day.

Kai's Baby Talk with Gramma

2008-09-05T07:15:00.000-07:00

On a sleepover date with Gramma -

Gramma - "Baby Evan is coming over!"
Kai - "Oh yay, he is just sooo cute!!"
Gramma - "Yes, he is"
Kai - "You know who else has a cute baby? Do you know Aunite Brenda that lives over there? She has a VERY cute baby."
Gramma - "Yes, she is cute too. Maybe one day you guys will have another really cute baby."
Kai - "Well not as cute"
Gramma - "Sure you will"
Kai - "Well....just look at Luca...."

Apparently Kai is none to impressed with what God gave us the second time...

My Kai Turns Five!

2008-08-24T12:35:00.000-07:00

I cannot believe that my wee baby has grown to a BIG boy. He is starting kindgergarten in just 2 short weeks. I drove by the school before school was out, and seeing the kids out on the play ground made me weepy - I anticipate I'll be a slobbering, blithering mess the day Kai steps out the door. Anyway, off track. I wanted to be intentional about sitting down and thinking about the things I love most about my Kai. I wanted to write them down and be able to think about them, remember them and appreciate and value each moment that he is 5.

1. I love the way he looks up past his glasses.

2. I love the way he poses for every picture (one arm crossed over the other and 'the look' - see #1)

3. I love when he tries to explain something to me - the inability to communicate fast enough what his little brain is thinking.

4. I love when he tells me how much he loves Luca, and that he is the cutest brother in the whole wide world.

5. I love his various expressions ie: "Mommy, I love you more than pigs and trees"

6. I love that he is so pumped about his Webkinz dolls and going online and saving up for a bathtub so he can give them a proper bath.

7. I love that he has so many new little friends. (Other than the ones we supplied FOR him through our own friends)

8. I love that he hears adult expressions and uses them in his day to day interactions. (I gotta watch every little thing I say)

9. I love to watch him sleep - those irresistable long dark lashes on his brown skin, and his pouty lips.

10. I love watching him talk - never has a kid had so much expression!

11. The dance moves. 'Nuff said.

Malachi - I am so so so so proud of you. I'm proud that you are learning to speak with kindness, control your temper, watch your manners, read books and the answer is YES (for all those times you double check with me that I still love you when you do bad things.) It still is a silly question, but today I affirm my answer - YES A HUNDRED TIMES OVER!!

Love Mommy

First Family Holiday

2008-08-11T09:18:00.001-07:00

Kai just after his first ever amusement park ride. Not quite sure why this pose, but he was right impressed with the whole event

Luca in his glory on the 'horsie' ride!!

Malachi in command of his first ever motorized vehicle. A good day for him all in all.

The family on top of Sulphur Mountain. The whole way up Luca kept yelling: "Up a Mountain, Up a Mountain!!"

The unbelievable view from the top!!

This is where Luca decided it was 'bight' and that he just HAD to wear my shades.

Malachi was none to impressed with the loud singing going on at this fabulous authentic Mexican Restaurant in downtown Calgary.

We had just eaten lunch beside some big, ugly, stinky camels.

We were exceptionally blessed when my parents, knowing the stress we had faced after losing the baby, offered to pay all the gas to join them on a holiday to Alberta. We did all the typical sight seeing things, and Malachi, with his larger than life personality, loved every minute of it. He declared that he wanted to be on holidays forever. My little Luca near broke my heart when after three days he begged on and off to 'go home, i go home. mommy home' This was usually when he was at the point of exhaustion. The other moments he was quite happy because he had his Papa. He has this strange obsession with an older mustached man, but the majority of his obsession is fixated on his papa. First thing his little eyes would snap open he would be asking for papa. I felt bad for my dad, who had Luca permanently attached to him at all times. He couldn't eat a meal, or visit the washroom without Luca in tow. (I know he secretly does enjoy the love and adoration of our wee 2 year old!) We were able to see my brother John's apartment for this first time, of which he is exceptionally proud. All in all, we returned home beyond exhausted but with a head and heart full of new memories. I will share just a few small snapshots of our time away.

Off for a Weekend Away

2008-07-29T09:19:00.000-07:00

We were gone last weekend for a 24 hr. prayer and planning retreat for the youth ministry at our church. We had a great time receiving words from the Lord and hearing what his heart was for the young people. We also had a great time laughing. That's priceless.

Never a Good Shot

2008-07-19T08:51:00.000-07:00

So I had it in my mind to start taking more pictures of my kids. I used my PC Points to buy a cool new camera, but STILL no good shots. What is going on? I have photographed a number of weddings, taken great pics of the boys a few years ago, and have done many a family photo for other people. But when it comes to my own kids, it's a no go. After deep contemplation, I realize what is going on. The only shots that are successful are those from far away, this is because:

1. Malachi has officially balked at the idea of smiling for the camera. He will have none of it. Just an idea a 4 yr. old got in his head, and is not willing to budge. The only solution is an ambush.

2. Luca simply never stops moving. He moves constantly and will not pose, and even if he does, it's for .3 seconds.

So... the pictures you see are the best I can get where there isn't a blur of movement.

After my final ultrasound in Wpg. yesterday (all is clear) we took the boys to St.Vital Park. We fed the ducks which was a huge highlight for the boys. I was a bit anxious about all the poop on the walkways, rocks and grass. (As pictured) We met our friends Cliff, Krista and little Luis for a picnic, and then headed off to the BDI for ice-cream. A nice old fashioned family day.

2008-07-17T20:57:00.000-07:00

And Life Goes On...

2008-07-17T13:36:00.000-07:00

So we are back in the swing of things. Trying to squeeze out some fun for the boys during a dark time. The sun really is shining most days again, and the peace that passes all understanding permeates my heart. I cry a little each day for our baby, but each day the tears are a wee bit smaller, the sobs a bit shorter, and my dry eyes are back a bit quicker. And so it is well with my soul.

Malachi was such a trooper. He was a little man of big faith - he would lay hands on me daily and pray that the baby would come back to life. On that note - he also told my Mom that she was getting old, and soon she would die, but that was okay, because he would just lay hands on her and raise her from the dead too. That's what God wants grownups to say.

Luca being only two, would put his chubbly little hands in the air and say.. "baby gone? Mommy baby gone?"

Tony stepped right up to bat in the last few weeks and let me rest. He played with the boys day in and day out. Rugby, basketball, bike trailer rides and warm water in our upgraded pool. (We went from a tupperware size to a 6 foot long one that even grownups can lounge in for some respite.)

All in all we are thankful. God his cemented some new truths about Himself in our hearts. He has reminded me again and again of the miracle that is Malachi and Luca. That as they were formed within me, their little hearts kept beating, and their little fingers kept forming, and they were perfect, and if that isn't a miracle, I don't know what is.

Today I Brushed My Teeth... and other milestones

2008-07-11T12:14:00.000-07:00

Today I woke up and brushed my teeth.
Today I said 'baby' without crying.
Today I ate a strawberry and it actually tasted like something.. delicious red sweet goodness.
Today I looked in the mirror and thought I really should do something about my hair.
Today I looked forward to tomorrow.

I bet the sun'll come out tomorrow....

Summer Days are Here Again

2008-07-07T21:03:00.000-07:00

So the timing couldn't be better in one sense: I'm 2 months pregnant and exhausted, and Tony is off work until the end of this first trimester, the really exhausting part. I sleep until all hours, and try not to miss too much of the fun as the boys are out in the pool on hot days, and in the puddles on cool ones. I don't want this summer to pass in a blur of heartburn, indigestion and catnaps... this is, after all, my last summer EVER with only 2 little men.

Unexpectedly Expecting

2008-07-02T09:33:00.001-07:00

You read the headline right. We are unexpectedly expecting a third baby, due next February. Of course, we are in the very early stages, but I wear my news on my sleeve, and so there it is. We pray for safety and good health for the wee Clark the third...

Kai's Face

2008-06-19T11:41:00.000-07:00

So here he is in all his splendor. Showing me all his different faces. This began with a simple haircut (compliments of Mommy as no one else is allowed near him with scissors) and ended with Kai in all his glory. Enjoy!

Lovely Luca

2008-06-17T06:43:00.000-07:00

Luca Oliver Livingstone Clark

Born March 2, 2006

So this story begins a bit more sane than the first time around. I didn't even nearly reach the 200 mark, and my ankles remained until the end. My stomach was just the right size, and although I lived in fear of 10 pounds, I was very pleased to welcome a very average 8 lb 5 oz baby boy. Labour was short and sweet (2 hours) and all natural. I often feel as though that was one of the best days of my life. It was incredibly amazing for both Tony and I to have a more natural birth. Luca came out all brown like the first time, with another full set of hair. I could also have sworn he had blue eyes, although everyone was quick to tell me that would change (it didn't!) My blue eyed, brown haired boy with those same incredible dimples his brother and dad have that make my heart just melt.

He was up every 1.5 hours to feed, but it didn't matter, because he didn't cry. I relished each moment of his early days as I really felt like my first attempt at mothering a newborn had been less than successful. He brought much joy to all of us, including Malachi who was desperate to hold him and tell him how much he loved him.

The major difference between the boys is not, unfortunately energy or persistance, but language. Luca is quite content to grunt and point, and now is over 2, with still barely understandble words. No more than 2 in a row either, with a long pause between. This is however, one of the things about him that is most endearing to me. His constant struggle to tell me something, of which he is convinced he's saying something quite obvious.

My other favourite thing about 'Coca' as he calls himself, is that his voice is all raspy and gorgeous. He was a newborn, and his cry was already raspy, and people would always ask me if he was sick. Nope- just a bit of Brian Adams going on there. If he sings, I think he will have the most incredible raspy voice. I want to teach him Brian's most famous lines like "Cuts like a knife" or "Have you ever really loved a woman." So if we're not calling him Coca or singing "Went to the Coca Cabana" to him, or calling him "pack a day" we pull out the "smirks." He is infamous for giving everyone these shy little smirks.

He is now full force into the twos, and I am amazed that he actually is just as stubborn and determined as his big brother. The only real sentences he does say are the insults he hurls at me on a daily basis. "No Mommy" "Bad Mommy" Timeouts are his second home and he looks straight at you doing exactly what he wants, knowing exactly what the consequences are. He hits his brother and throws toys at him on a daily basis. The only problem is, I'm still wrapped around his little finger....

My Kai

2008-06-17T06:14:00.000-07:00

I thought it might be a neat idea to write a synopsis of each of my boys. So here it goes:

Malachi Thomas Livingstone Clark

Born August 14, 2003 (age 4 almost 5)

My first paragraph has be be about where it began. Me - ten months pregnant, 208 pounds with enough water retention to water our nation's gardens and a stomach that looked like it housed an army. His will was ascerted at a very young age in this simple act of definance: he refused to come out. Absolutely committed to the womb. After being nearly 2 weeks overdue, and the highest dose of pitocin the doctors could legally give me labour began. 18 hours later out came my man baby. 10 lbs 5 oz and a head circumfrance that wasn't even ON the circumfrance chart. A thick black wig and man hands completed the look. We named him 'Tuktoyuktuk' in tribute to his very Inuit looking appearance.

That stuck for a bout a month. Then, well, we just HAD to call him Malacry because he did just that - cried for months on end. He was awake and crying in my arms until the son rose almost every day. He has had the most persistant nature since the beginning. Thankfully, by 6 months things calmed down, and by 9 months, I was fully in love.

We knew early on that he was exceptionally gifted with words and language. He had a few words down by eight months, and short sentences by one year. By 18 months he was expressing his feelings - "Mommy - I feel fustrated" He has always been terriffic at communicating how he is feeling and remembering words after hearing them once. He usually innately understands their meanings too. He understood phonics at 3 1/2 and before the age of 4 was already sounding out words. What a gift from the Lord - it thrills me to see how God will use that gifting.

Like Most two years olds, he was incredible at communicating all the things that he didn't appreciate. Any sort of transition in his day - cue the meltdown. He hurled insults and threw anything within reach. There were days I thought I would never live it through. He behaved like a child who had just had 10 pounds of sugar and a case of redbull. People often commented on his endless energy which was both fun to watch (as he pulled out his Elvis dance moves at church, followed by a break dance routine) or totally unbelievable. I had a girlfriend with my once who experienced a full stage 10 episode, and she was incredulous. She commented that she'd heard of what he could do, but couldn't even believe it to see it. That's my boy.

He's now 4 turning 5 and heading to kindergarten. I can't believe it. I just know I'm going to cry.

Some things to know:

He is an excellent dancer

He loves to sing but can't carry a tune (much to his own frustration)

He has an incredible ability to create things in play

He is a bit leery of new things (like his big bike) and takes a while to warm up to it

He is one of the most persistant people I have ever met

He encourages me (and others) with beautiful words of affirmation

He loves quality time with anyone

Kai's most recent quote: (while driving to church)

"Mommy, I can't marry KK right? Because she's just a baby and I'm 4" (to which I replied - "well I thought you were going to marry Eryn?" To which he replied..") "Oh yah, that. Well, I have a lot of choices"

Thats my boy - playing the field.

The Best Intentions

2008-06-16T12:19:00.000-07:00

So here I begin. I'm notoriously awful at journaling, or keeping track of day to day happenings. I really can't remember when my boys cut their first teeth, or first said "Mommy" so here is my attempt at journaling. Sorry to Tony - he bought me this gorgeous hand made leather journal from India that I just can't bear to write in - it's too beautiful to touch. Maybe if I get good at this blogging thing I will trust myself to finally crack open those gorgeous leather pages and write some love letters to my tony.kai.luca.